| Crushing lyrics |
[Apr. 6th, 2006|05:36 pm] |
I can't stop listening to this song - absolutely unbelieveable.
Nothing can compare to punk angst, honesty and pain.
It strikes so deep.
Joey Cape - "Wind in Your Sails"
"It's negative
I wish you the worst dear,
to feel the greatest pain
a positive,
you said it's all in vain
I know I felt,
and i won't feel again.
I know you.
Hours of madness
Years of dysfunction
The deepest embitterment
No will to strive or achieve
Finally in breakdown
Perpetual fall on your knees
As you crawl back to me
It ends like this
I can hope for bliss,
if you fail again
'cause i'm right here'
to witness every step
and when you trip
I will cherish it.
Hours of madness
Years of dysfunction
The deepest embitterment
No will to strive or achieve
Finally in breakdown
Perpetual fall on your knees
As you crawl back to...
I live to watch you fail
I live to watch you fail
I live to watch you fail
I am the wind in your sail
I wish you the worst dear
to feel the greatest pain
'cause i'm right here'
to retrieve all you stole
every tear and everything you own
i wish you...
Hours of madness
Years of dysfunction
The deepest embitterment
no will to trust anyone
this is how i lived
this is how you left me blue
and I'd crawl back to you"
P.S. This isn't directed at anyone, there is no hidden message in this post. |
|
|
| CDs that demand some attention |
[Mar. 22nd, 2006|12:10 am] |
Joey Cape/Tony Sly - "Acoustic" - Fat Wreck Chords - Lead singers of Lagwagon and No Use for A Name jammin' with an acoustic guitar (need I say more?)
Lagwagon - "Resolve" - Fat Wreck Chords - Just what kiddies? - the boys are back to their roots!!!
Seriously, I have to change my pants most time I listen to them. I know that is inappropriate and vulgar but you'll understand when you listen to these puppies.
P.S. I will be inheriting a dog in the coming years - his name is Sampson. That is unless my grandma outlives me, which I'm pretty sure she is going to. Maybe she can take care of Camus when I'm gone. |
|
|
| Quick update from the depths of the beast. |
[Oct. 17th, 2005|10:10 pm] |
Down in Lansing, Michigan. Flags at half-mast almost without change. $10 will buy you 10 pounds of ham and they sell chips in a family size bag that Pavorotti would be impressed with.
Smokin a Cuban on the steps of the Michigan Supreme Court, getting my car searched and being interrogated at the border when sansMeghan.
'Dicker and Deals' that could arm a malitia and some where you could furnish a house for $500.
Dodging honourable Reps on the way to class and steering clear of the State Police cruisers.
Cheap seasons of MASH help to relieve tension by indulging dark, existential humour. Webcams and calling card scams (screw you SBC).
"what did you have to say?
give me your logic, your definition,
the words you twist to justify your position
of mass starvation and blind airstrikes,
every problem is solved with a fight
peace won't be found,
til we're underground,
as long as we live without a sound
so pride yourself on what you are,
and hold them all to words they can't take back,
I've seen a place (it comes) to me in dreams
where fires die but light still shines for us to see
would God bless a murder of the innocents?
would God bless a war based on pride?
would God bless a money-hungry government? no.
would God bless our ineffective court system?
God bless the sweatshops we run.
would God bless Amerika?
God bless Amerika."
RISE AGAINST - "Red, White and Blue"
Life swims by in a blur, waiting to live - waiting to finally breathe in her arms during those few short hours at the twilight of the week. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Mar. 30th, 2005|10:56 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Happy Birthday Baby Jesus - Remix | ] |
Happy almost Birthday Meghan!!! April the 3rd isn't long away now!
The upside is that in few days you can go drinking down in the U.S. now, a fufillment of a lifetime dream, I know.
The Countdown Begins... |
|
|
| Family... |
[Feb. 3rd, 2005|10:16 pm] |
I wonder why the bonds of family are considered to be so strong. Does blood have anything to do with loyalty. Nothing against my immediate family (I love them with all I am), but through my life I have realized that the old adage that "no matter who comes or goes, family will always be there" doesn't hold much water.
I feel that the loss of a friend or someone close to you can impact you in the same way the loss of a family member does. I get out of exams because my great aunt died but if my friend died I wouldn't necessarily. Is it more a factor of the time, moments and level of emotions we feel for eachother, rather than sharing of genetic material? The idea of blood or traditional family may be an antiquated notion. My love for my own family is not because they are my blood but what they have done for me, the times we shared and helped each other; especially the times we forgave when it wasn't deserved. Might we not have these things, possibly in greater proportions with others?
We all may be hurt or pushed away from our traditional family, but if one understands them to be simply other, fallible human beings who we happen to have a deep, close relationship with, the pain of the rejection is cast into a importantly different light. Maybe its best to spread your own net of those close to you widely and choose carefully who they are, that way you are able to control, though in a small way, those people whose opinions, love and compassion have play a foundational role in your life.
Anyways, please excuse this late night rant, it probably doesn't make any sense. When I'm of sound mind I'll edit it :)
In peace and struggle. |
|
|
| One peacefuly, snowfilled Saturday night in January |
[Jan. 23rd, 2005|07:45 pm] |
I had a really great time with a dear, close friend of mine last night. A night of tranquility and smiles that was such a welcome break to a long week.
No matter how much you think you know someone, it's always such a priviledge when you can learn just a little more. To glimpse, one more time, into even one corner of their personality and life, allows you learn something new and come to appreciate them all the more.
In the midst of a snow laden and bitterly cold night, the conversation (and a few shots of Tequila) sustained our souls into the early morning hours.
The best times are so often not planned at all, they give you a glimpse of light in an otherwise darkening existence.
I'll count myself lucky, few people can even hope to share in the wealth and embrace of your friendship.
Here's to you, all that you have done for me and for the hope of many more nights like that to come. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jan. 21st, 2005|12:06 am] |
Pull the covers over my head and
shut out the screams that resonate
though my frame.
I won't, I can't. |
|
|
| It's a little cold. |
[Jan. 20th, 2005|07:05 pm] |
After a rigorous, mind numbing lecture on sovereign immunity in International Law I went outside of Sid Smith for a bit of sustenance.
There was only one hot dog stand left, one out of a usual five that line St. George preying on depressed and undernourished poli sci students.
The proprietor of the lone stand stood huddled against a small propane heater. She looked at me with undisguised hate as my request for a veggie dog would mean she would have to move from her one position of comfort. The $2.25 hardly seemed enough to compensate.
It took me five minutes to chip away a couple of iced olives from the cube. The relish was a solid mass, a complete no go.
The mustard and mayo were unrelenting.
Crap. |
|
|
| Strange Pets... |
[Jan. 19th, 2005|11:39 pm] |
My little hedgehog, Camus, is pissed off at me right now. She can be such a little devil some times. She crapped on the hinge of the cage, exactly where I always have to put my finger.
She is completely litter trained, so you know that her "suprabox shits" are carefully planned statements. No joke, and they smell like "feet" according to a reliable source (you know who you are).
When she is out running around on my desk and doesn't like the band playing she'll run across the keyboard, an action which always puts my computer in "standby" mode.
She hates NOFX and Rise Against. |
|
|
| Guilty Pleasure |
[Jan. 19th, 2005|11:35 pm] |
Everyone has this, it may be embaressing, but everyone has a CD that they would never be caught dead listening to except alone or in the presence of loved ones.
I need to clear my conscience on this subject, this is hard but it's got to be done.
I own, listen to and enjoy (in a low, appetitive sense) the new Green Day "American Idiot".
There, I said it.
Eat it. |
|
|
| America |
[Jan. 19th, 2005|11:19 pm] |
In the wake of the recent elections, a significant portion of the world were completely taken back in dumbfounded horror. This man may have slipped into office like a greased monkey the first time, but surely the American public would not willingly give him a second mandate and support for his policies that have put the world in a chokehold.
I traveled to New York over Christmas, one of the homes to the counterculture of the 1950s. They reacted against ultra-nationalism and a culture of fear and paranoia.
I have struggled to find words to express this time in history, I suppose it may be too overwhelming to be living through it right now, or it may just be my infinite inability to harness the english language.
I keep coming back to a poem by Ginsberg, nothing else has been able to adequately capture the moment quite like he did so many decades ago.
Hopefully it will resonate with you too.
AMERICA - Allen Ginsberg
America I've given you all and now I'm nothing.
America two dollars and twenty-seven cents January 17, 1956.
I can't stand my own mind.
America when will we end the human war?
Go fuck yourself with your atom bomb
I don't feel good don't bother me.
I won't write my poem till I'm in my right mind.
America when will you be angelic?
When will you take off your clothes?
When will you look at yourself through the grave?
When will you be worthy of your million Trotskyites?
America why are your libraries full of tears?
America when will you send your eggs to India?
I'm sick of your insane demands.
When can I go into the supermarket and buy what I need with my good looks?
America after all it is you and I who are perfect not the next world.
Your machinery is too much for me.
You made me want to be a saint.
There must be some other way to settle this argument.
Burroughs is in Tangiers I don't think he'll come back it's sinister.
Are you being sinister or is this some form of practical joke?
I'm trying to come to the point.
I refuse to give up my obsession.
America stop pushing I know what I'm doing.
America the plum blossoms are falling.
I haven't read the newspapers for months, everyday somebody goes on trial for
murder.
America I feel sentimental about the Wobblies.
America I used to be a communist when I was a kid and I'm not sorry.
I smoke marijuana every chance I get.
I sit in my house for days on end and stare at the roses in the closet.
When I go to Chinatown I get drunk and never get laid.
My mind is made up there's going to be trouble.
You should have seen me reading Marx.
My psychoanalyst thinks I'm perfectly right.
I won't say the Lord's Prayer.
I have mystical visions and cosmic vibrations.
America I still haven't told you what you did to Uncle Max after he came over
from Russia.
I'm addressing you.
Are you going to let our emotional life be run by Time Magazine?
I'm obsessed by Time Magazine.
I read it every week.
Its cover stares at me every time I slink past the corner candystore.
I read it in the basement of the Berkeley Public Library.
It's always telling me about responsibility. Businessmen are serious. Movie
producers are serious. Everybody's serious but me.
It occurs to me that I am America.
I am talking to myself again.
Asia is rising against me.
I haven't got a chinaman's chance.
I'd better consider my national resources.
My national resources consist of two joints of marijuana millions of genitals
an unpublishable private literature that goes 1400 miles and hour and
twentyfivethousand mental institutions.
I say nothing about my prisons nor the millions of underpriviliged who live in
my flowerpots under the light of five hundred suns.
I have abolished the whorehouses of France, Tangiers is the next to go.
My ambition is to be President despite the fact that I'm a Catholic.
America how can I write a holy litany in your silly mood?
I will continue like Henry Ford my strophes are as individual as his
automobiles more so they're all different sexes
America I will sell you strophes $2500 apiece $500 down on your old strophe
America free Tom Mooney
America save the Spanish Loyalists
America Sacco & Vanzetti must not die
America I am the Scottsboro boys.
America when I was seven momma took me to Communist Cell meetings they
sold us garbanzos a handful per ticket a ticket costs a nickel and the
speeches were free everybody was angelic and sentimental about the
workers it was all so sincere you have no idea what a good thing the party
was in 1935 Scott Nearing was a grand old man a real mensch Mother
Bloor made me cry I once saw Israel Amter plain. Everybody must have
been a spy.
America you don're really want to go to war.
America it's them bad Russians.
Them Russians them Russians and them Chinamen. And them Russians.
The Russia wants to eat us alive. The Russia's power mad. She wants to take
our cars from out our garages.
Her wants to grab Chicago. Her needs a Red Reader's Digest. her wants our
auto plants in Siberia. Him big bureaucracy running our fillingstations.
That no good. Ugh. Him makes Indians learn read. Him need big black niggers.
Hah. Her make us all work sixteen hours a day. Help.
America this is quite serious.
America this is the impression I get from looking in the television set.
America is this correct?
I'd better get right down to the job.
It's true I don't want to join the Army or turn lathes in precision parts
factories, I'm nearsighted and psychopathic anyway.
America I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel. |
|
|
| Live Journal Debut - Awkward, halting and generally strange |
[Jan. 18th, 2005|10:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | This option creeps me out | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Fake Plastic Trees - Radiohead | ] |
What this journal will involve, I still have no idea.
For my first entry I'll give a brief overview of where I am in my life. I'm in the midst of applying to law schools and grad schools all over. It's so difficult being at the mercy of institutions like this, where I'll be and what choices I'll have in front of me in the near future is uncertain.
My girlfriend of four years (January 27) is Meghan. She freakin rocks. It will come up a lot, I warn you. She is a double major Buddhism-English at U of T (hot combination), puck rock girl with the elegance of Audrey Hepburn (sounds contradictory, but if you met her you would understand).
I work with my Dad's law firm, I research anti-terrorism legislation around the world and its impact on charities, NGOs and the like. The latest Anti-terrorism and Charity Law Alert that I wrote can be found at www.antiterrorismlaw.ca
I struggle in all my relationships in my life, with my family, friends and with the love of my life, Meghan. I am weak and tired of the struggle, the blame and responsibility lies with me.
I'll update the rest of this stuff lat1er, lest it drone on like self-pitying drivel.
In peace and Struggle. |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
camusrebel's journal